This just in

A Claysburg, Pa., teenager has been crowned LG National Texting champion in New York after she typed on her cell phone faster than any other contestant.

Morgan Pozgar, 13, managed to thumb type two lines of the Mary Poppins song Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious [in 15 seconds] to take home the $25,000 top prize in Saturday's contest, the New York Daily News reported Sunday.

I'm going to go shopping and buy lots of clothes, the prolific texter said after besting 200 other competitors at the Roseland Ballroom.

I'm not denying that this is quite the accomplishment. I probably couldn't do it in 15 minutes. But she's 13. Shouldn't somebody give her a ball and put her outside?

This totally isn't her, but I googled her name and this is what came up, so this is what I'm posting!

*Edited to add: Here she is. I found 'er. She's cute! And not at all the giant blob I secretly expected her to be!